Friday, 17 February 2012

Coffee with a Friend

My friend went home. One of my closest friends who I've known for over 7 years being around at uni, being in my room when I came home from lectures, chatting to my friends and learning all about my new life made it so much more prevalent when she left quite how different my here relationships with friends are.

We managed to talk all day for one of the days, there was never a gap as we filled each other in on our lives but the next day, we were happy just to sit in silence. We traded a few words but we didn't need to talk, just being around someone you know so well is such a filling feeling. It reminds you that you're not alone, these people will always be there for you.

And one of the things that is so different between us compared to the people I currently live with, platitudes. I can make my friends here a cup of tea but it comes laden with so many thank yous and return offers that its value as a gift is diminished. It feels like a transaction. My friend was happy to wake up one morning with a bad headache, roll over and ask me to fetch her a sock filled with peas. She was happy to ask for my help and to let me coddle her without trying to out-do me in the competition of favours. I love that comfort, that level of closeness that doesn't need to verbally acknowledge every favour, it knows it's freely given and understands that repayment needn't be immediate or equal in a materialistic value but that it is coming, even though it is entirely not needed.

Today's coffee with a friend has been one of those coffees where I phone you in the morning and say, hey, lets get coffee today because we haven't been out in ages, but really I have an ulterior motive and want to talk my thoughts through with you and coffee seemed the best way to get at you.

So, sorry for offloading on you, but aren't you glad I chose you?

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